In this world there are a few absolute truths. Nothing lasts forever, everything changes, and you can’t depend on anyone but yourself. No one owes you your happiness, your success, an explanation, or an apology. No one in the world is even obligated to show up for you. Not your parents, not your siblings, not your man (or your lady), not your best friend since you were 8 years old. If and when they do show up…for me? That’s where my appreciation spills into a fruitless pursuit of wanting to know how in the world I got so lucky. Because they don’t owe me anything, but they showed up any way. It was that time…at my college graduation…The one where my mom passed away a year before I could walk across the stage. The two remaining most important people to me in my life told me they also weren’t going to show up because they had other obligations. I was so upset. I actually felt sorry for myself and couldn’t believe I did all of this work just to be treated like I accomplished nothing. But then I complained to Dean (co-creator and co-host of The Relatables), and he re-asserted…no, he actually TAUGHT me, that even though it hurts, no one in this world owes me a damn thing. And that was tough for me to swallow, because – The truth will set you free, but first it’ll piss you off.
I think that was the preface to my realization that the only person I can depend on is myself. If I can’t even do that, then what do I have? From then on, even when they didn’t show the day of graduation (though I still had my fingers crossed), I had this overwhelming sense of pride bursting from within because I was now truly free to celebrate me. I told myself I was going to finish, and I did. I told myself I was going to move to California, and I did. I told myself I was going to try standup, and I (finally) did. I told myself I was going to see at least one new country every year, and ever since then, I have.
If anything is certain in this world, it is that I’m as good as my word.
Thank you for showing me the way, Dean.