Category: Here’s The Thing

I’m not gonna mince words here. It is what it is. Life is hard…really fuckin hard. I was joking with Zack about how growing up is like slowly realizing that you’re not special and don’t have super powers. Like it takes 30 years to realize you’re not Harry Potter.

I don’t mean for this to seem depressing, but I think people are sad. I think people are sad and lonely and it drives them to make a lot of their day to day and even life decisions.

I was talking to a friend about relationships and settling (that’s a whole other post), but my point of view was ultimately that life is hard, and people don’t so much settle as they find someone who makes life suck a little less. From the outside, you can see the toxic energy, but from the inside, it’s just enough better to get through the day and make it to tomorrow.

It’s the same with staying in shape and being fit. Whether it’s restricting your diet and activities or working at a calorie deficit to lose weight, it’s not easy. My dad has a saying, “Just cause it’s simple, doesn’t mean it’s easy,” and it’s so true about life. Temporary mouth pleasure often outweighs long term goals. And a sedentary lifestyle is so much easier than waking up early for work to squeeze in a run, workout, or stretch. A buddy of mine recently changed his life after watching a short video about how if you don’t have 15 minutes a day to improve yourself, what are you really doing? That’s about 1% of your day. Yet still, people are convinced they are too busy because it’s so much easier to fill the void than to live in the void (the void that is the mystery of life).

It’s the reason why so few of us actually attain their dream of “success”- not just money or status, but the dedication to see something through; the dedication to actualize a thought. It’s so much easier to consume and numb the pain of rejection or failure than to create and feel the friction of experience.

As usual, I start with a thought and trail into a rant, but I think I said enough. I try to see the beauty and silver lining in everything because I feel the sadness and uselessness of everything.

I think part of the reason social media is so popular and alluring, is cause it allows people to be a shitty uninvolved friend, without feeling the guilt or loneliness. I realized last week that I have a lot of friends on social media (*a lot to me*), but only truly interact with a handful of them. I do know all my friends personally, or at least the people I follow (*besides celebrities*). This is starting to have a few more Astriss than I would’ve liked, but no matter, no matter. I was thinkin about how if I didn’t see these peoples’ post or pictures, I wouldn’t think about these people. I don’t talk to them daily or see them often, I don’t hit them up when I’m bored or when I need something. In that thought, I felt like those “friends” were just extras with weak backstories. It made me feel guilty for not being a better friend or being more involved.

Here’s the thing, just like a healthy diet will lead to a fit lifestyle. A healthy social media diet will lead to healthy mental health. Sometimes I forget that we are a byproduct of what we consume and I get sucked into the limitless that is the internet. And after I get my fill, on what whatever it is, Instagram, YouTube, etc. I still feel empty. It’s like the bag of chips you thought you wanted. Then you eat the whole bag and your not full, and you still feel the need to eat something of substance. That’s usually when I throw on a podcast and try to do something in the real world.

I touched on it in my last post, but I think people need to be aware of social media, and focus more of their relationships in real life. That last bit sounds a bit preachy, but I think it’s cause I’m talking to myself and I need to hear it. Lately I feel like I’ve felt lonelier than usual and it feels good to “fuck off” and be average. But like I’ve said before. “If you knew better, you would do better.” And I know better…

I think I believe in love a first sight, or at least lust at first sight. But I’m not sure if I believe in soul mates. It’s a weird place to start, I know, but I’ll get there.

Maybe I’m negative, but when it comes to the sheer numbers, I think it would be a pretty sick joke to put your soul mate on the other side of the planet, or the next city over for that matter. I believe that people vibrate at different frequencies. Usually people vibrate pretty similar to their friend group. The same way “ladies” periods will line up if they live together 🤷🏾‍♂️. Or the way you can tell someone is from the South or foreign. Aside from vibrating on that cultural wave, people have very unique tones, based on their experiences, influences, and aspirations.

I don’t know if it’s confidence or charisma. But there is something about either having your shit together or not giving a fuck, that people can just smell on you. It’s like people have evolved to sense the realness in others. And with all the posturing and flexing, there’s something subconscious that people feel when you are genuine. It’s been my experience, that when I am truly in the moment, not caring about who is watching, or how I may look, and free of expectation. That’s when I seem to ring at my truest tone. Things seem to fall into place. I just seem like I’m in the right place at the right time, way more often. Meet new people, get invited to do new things, and am open to learning lessons that I don’t think I normally would be.

I know I said I’d get there, but idk where I was going. This is more about just being yourself and letting it ring true, to attract the positive energy that comes from vibrating at your own frequency.

🚨 Political Post 🚨

I’ve noticed from my interactions on Facebook that Conservatives are very willing to talk and debate ideas. While on the other hand Liberals are more likely to laugh at the idea, talk down, or not make it worth their time.

I’m wondering if others have had this same experience. I think it’s because a lot of liberal ideas are emotion and utopia based, where as many conservative ideas are more rooted in application.

I do want to say that I don’t know what I’m talking about. I don’t quite know what I identify as- “liberal”, if I had to guess, but when I interact with conservatives online, they make some points. I don’t know enough to argue, so I usually just try to listen or ask questions and learn as much as I can about either side but like I said earlier, liberals usually aren’t as forthcoming with thier ideas, usually assuming that you’re either already on board or that ship has left. I think it’s “sexy” to some people to be associated with ideas or a movement. And with social media as polarizing as it is, if you don’t know how to feel, you are part of the problem.

I think Chris Rock said it best in one of his specials. He said something to the effect of, “No one is 100% one thing. Anyone that makes up their mind before they hear the issue is a fool. There are some things I’m liberal about and other things I’m conservative about. Crime. I’m conservative. Prostitution. I’m liberal”. Shout out to Chris, but I think in this day and age, nuance isn’t sexy (especially not in the news). We are the generation of texts, vines and Snapchat. Our attention spans seem to be getting shorter, and with that the news has become more polarizing.

I started this thinking I was going to make a post for Facebook,but realized I’m not that person. Maybe I’ll repost this, if anyone will read it. On some subliminal level, I feel like talking to real people is the best way to form opinions. Articles can be skewed, corrected, have agendas…all kinds of things. Plus, I don’t know those people. It’s the same reason I don’t like or listen to Rotten Tomatoes film reviews. I dont know those people and they don’t know me. So why would I take their advice on a movie I might really enjoy? I know I’m young, and will probably grow out of these ideas, but when you feel inspired for “Here’s The Thing”, you let it flow.

I’m just a stereotype of a black male misunderstood, but it’s still all good.

Over the past year, I’ve been really learning how to become a professional. In the sense that things need to be done.

Rome wasn’t build in a day, but it also wasn’t built when they felt like it. I think everyone struggles with “feelin it”. If not, then maybe this could be about mental illness instead of professionalism. Really it’s just riding the roller coaster between uber motivated and driven and then riding through feelings of stagnation and unproductive thoughts.

This week was just one of those lull weeks. Was late to work, a cheap meal turned into a cheap day, that turned into a cheat weekend. Then I’m stuck to pull myself out of the hole I’ve created, to hold myself accountable to the person I want to become. It’s just like Zack and I talked about in the last episode. Once you have integrity or a standard, it is very hard to go back. I know that being healthy and responsible is who I want to be, and I can’t justify making excuses.

Some days I feel like I’m really on to something, like I figuring things out. Then days like last week, you realize you have a lot of growing up to do. C’est La Vie.

*This was edited, after the fact. But no one will notice.*

*except Zack*

It takes a certain kind of person to strive to be the best. That, plus an incredible amount of determination to become it. But the reason why some are seen as the greatest of all time or legends, is because the consistency they achieved to stay the best.

Growing up and even now, I always equated this to athletes like Micheal Jordan or Jon Jones. Micheal Jordan was one of my sports idols growing up, not just because of Space Jam, but because the legacy he left in his presence and wake. I once heard it phrased that “Jordan kept a lot of Hall of Famers from getting rings”. As a Jacksonville Jaguars fan, I know what it’s like to have a good season, only to be figured out and squelched the next.

Maybe it’s luck or circumstance, but it’s not impossible to get to the top. But once you’ve been figured out, your not a flash in the pan, people see your weaknesses, and people are driven to beat you. That’s when true greatness is tested. To be a truly unstoppable force is to succeed in the face of constant hungry challengers.

As usual, I don’t know where I’m going with this, and managed to ramble till it all ran together. But I think I say that to say this. Dream beyond your goals. If attaining your goals is the end, once you do, the thrill is gone. But like my mom always says, “Be the best at getting better!”