I’d apologize for my absence but I know you didn’t miss me. I’ve got 9 minutes to pump out this bad boy so let me just fill you in a little about what my brain’s been buzzing’ on and then I’ll hit the sack…and then go to bed. Hiyo! I was going to make an excuse for why I haven’t written in a while but even I rolled my eyes at it. I’ve just been lazy. There’s no way around it. I’ve also been a little bit on the unhinged side of the cabinet. Yesterday I bitched out a kid who tried to commit suicide through Instagram DM’s. It’s weird though because I don’t even feel that bad about it. This kid is a good dude, a smart dude but he just annoys the shit out of me. He complains and bitches and moans and groans to a point that’s intolerable. Most of his wounds are self inflicted yet he still seems to find the worse in everything that anyone creates or puts out. I’m a little drunk and trying to be somewhat protective of his identity but I think you kind of get the gist of what kind of person he is. It’s the dude who shits on everything and thinks he’s smarter and more aware than everyone. Anywho, apparently he tried to kill himself by O.D.’ing and then he made an Instagram post telling everyone about it and how it lead to him taking a sabbatical from his podcast. It was a real “Facebook Folly” (because Facebook owns Instagram). I have no idea why but it just rubbed me the wrong way. It just seemed like he did it and then told everyone about it to get attention, then he got all snarky with me when I was trying to reach out. I thought about it a little today and realized why I got so cunty. I still think what I said was justified and stuff he needed someone to tell him but the reason I got so personal is because I think we’re similar in a lot of ways. Honestly, I don’t really know this person, we’re just acquaintances from high school but he annoys me because when I hear him talk he reminds me too much of myself. I’m cynical and tear shit down without knowing what went in to making it or trying to think from another person’s perspective. I think most of us get annoyed when we see people exhibit the same characteristics we don’t like about ourselves. I’m not saying anything new here and I’m kind of getting into the weeds so I’ll just cut it off here. I’ll be back tomorrow.
Episode 126: Mrs. Ugly
Tee Grizzley – Had To
Pearl Jam – Jeremy
Sugar Friends
I have a new app idea, where you go mobile to find girlfriends who have sugar daddies – and those girlfriends invite you out to hang with them and their glucose guardians. The point? Well, you reap some awesome sugar benefits without any strings attached! You heard it here first. I’m calling it Sugar Friends. The other night I went to LA (I live in Orange County) to meet up with my girl visiting from Georgia, and she brought along her met online fructose parent. I have honestly never seen one of these sucrose fathers in action, in the flesh…so when he started pulling wads of cash out to pay for everything our hearts desired I was unnecessarily shook. I’d even try to order my own dignified independent girl drink, and then he’d swoop in and take care of the tab while also wooing the female bartenders with overly healthy tips. It felt awkward at first, getting taken care of this damn much, as just the friend of the levulose child (sugar baby synonym, keep up with me!)…but eventually I got drunk and the cares stopped forming. It was a fantastic place to be. I’m just not into the concept enough to full on commit to a real one (I know, no one’s putting a gun to my head and forcing me to either, I’m just having a conversation here). I don’t have disrespect for people who thrive on these arrangements, as long as no one is getting hurt. Pride is a powerful imaginary force – A tradeoff I haven’t been able to forgo when it comes to strutting my independence. My dad (my real dad guys not a xylose one!), randomly told me once, like Rhonda Rousey said, “don’t be a do-nothing bitch”. There’s a lot of things he’s taught me that I’ve held onto like flies on shit…and this is one of them. Don’t be a do-nothing bitch. Rhonda’s speech explaining what a DNB is went like this:
“A kind of chick that just tries to be pretty and be taken care of by somebody else. That’s why I think it’s hilarious when people say my body looks masculine or something like that. Listen, just because my body was developed for a purpose other than f—ing millionaires, doesn’t mean it’s masculine. I think it’s femininely badass as f— because there’s not a single muscle in my body that isn’t for a purpose. Because I’m not a do-nothing bitch.”
In the end, I think life is just about balance. I tend to remain moderately firm in my convictions because I’m flexible when it comes to change and the evolution of circumstances. In LA that day, I was taken care of and I had the kind of time I’m still buzzing from days later. Back in Orange County today, I’m back to taking care of myself. Extremes are easy. Strive for balance.
Back Dated
I’m a day late, but never a story short. Hence the title. But I kept trying to think of something of substance to write about this week until the final hour, and I fucked around, like Lamar Odom at All-Star Weekend.
Earlier this year I read David Goggin’s book Can’t Hurt Me. Well, I listened to the audiobook but same difference. But he mentions something in there about the difference between motivation and drive. As I made some changes in my life, I’ve noticed the things that have driven me and the things that have motivated me.
I’ve been motivated, like everyone else, to do a lot of things in my life. To get in shape, to “get this bread,” to chase my dreams. I’ve also been driven to do many others, like pursue comedy and be true to myself.
He describes motivation as a spark of inspiration, usually lasting a couple of weeks. Then drifting away, like the books you were going to read or the diet you were going to stick to. But one thing he highlights is that motivation is like an adrenaline dump, and after it’s gone you’re left with pure will.
The will to do or to not.
Drive usually results in a lifestyle change and the effects last much longer than motivation.
There is a lot of grey area in the space between motivation and drive. And in this space we usually find ourselves faced with the question to challenge ourselves to the unknown or to welcome back the familiar.
He advises to look for things that drive you. I like to think of it as motivation being a pushing force, that when it’s behind you can force you to do things you wouldn’t before, but when that push is gone, the struggle falls back on you. I describe drive, on the other hand, as a pull. A force that draws you to it, like a siren to the rocks, or a moth to a light. It’s an incessant desire for a certain dream or person or place. Motivation is deciding to fight, and Drive is the plan you have after you get hit. Eh, works for me. But my point is find the things in life that drive you, whether it’s to a pursuit of happiness, or betterment, or just cause. Where there is a will, there is a way.
Episode 125: Favorite Jerker
The guys discuss when parent’s should go “all-in” on their professional gamer, talk comedy and discover that single women are happier (according to SCIENTIFIC findings). Dean gives his number (his sex number) and NBA playoff predictions are made.
Chance the Rapper ft. TisaKorean & Murda Beatz – GRoCERIES
Jonah Yano, BADBADNOTGOOD – nervous
Learn how to Learn
My mom had a saying that I’m pretty sure she made up, but it has always stuck with me. I even have it written on my wall.
“The best at getting better” -Mom
It’s a really simple, and very humble way to approach progress. I’ve always wanted to be a jack of all trades, be open to all possibilities, and try everything. When I was younger, I used to call myself “The Natural” (on video games lol). But it had to do with that fact that I pick up on things quickly. The more things I try and the more things I learn, the better I get at trying and learning new things. I’ve learned how to learn. Looking back on school, I’ve tried to think about it more as learning how to learn, than learning what you need to know. Of course there are things you learn in school that you need to know, but I feel the majority of what you do is learn how to learn, that way when you do find something you are passionate or interested in you have the tools to get better at it. Learning how to problem solve, how to research, how to work with others- those are all basic skills you need to get better at anything in life. Changing my perspective to appreciate that fact has helped me become better at getting better, because I understand the process and what it takes to get better, at anything…whether it’s slack line, comedy, relationships, or running.
therelatables.com 